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The Art of Civil Communication with Yourself



As social beings, we spend a lot of time discussing the best way to communicate with others. Civilly communicating with others is an important part of human interaction. It reduces conflict and invites an open platform for peaceful dialogue. I am a huge advocate of this, which goes without saying as I am a Communication Strategist. Communication is an art form. It's a powerful masterpiece when done correctly, and can be an effective tool for achieving our goals. However, when done poorly, it can not only hinder our success but sabotage the tranquility of our present state. When words aren't constructed to create synergy during our delivery, the result can be disastrous. We could cause friction in our relationships, lose out on that huge deal we've been trying to close, or incur job loss. Poise and remaining civil in challenging situations have the power to change the entire trajectory of our lives. The interesting part is that most people are very aware of this insight. However, we only think of it concerning others.


As I said before, communication is a powerful tool. What we fail to realize is that we communicate with ourselves daily. Shouldn't our conversations with ourselves be a priority? Absolutely. In most instances, the little voice in your head is the first communication you have when your wake. It is important to make certain that this "self-talk" is civil and soothing. The worst thing you can do is start your day with a negative conversation. What could negative conversations consist of? Here's a list of subtle negative conversations that are quietly stealing your joy.

  1. Telling yourself how stressful your day will be because you have a lot to do.

  2. Waking up and immediately allowing the dread of going to work to seep into your thoughts.

  3. Becoming discouraged by rejection and telling yourself you won't reach your goals.

  4. Comparing yourself to others and speaking negatively to yourself.

All of these intimate conversations can have detrimental effects by manifesting these thoughts in your life. The negative conversation you've allowed in your mind has now transcended itself to your actions. It can destroy your motivation and your entire outlook on life. We have to be very careful to catch these damaging thoughts and work hard to transform them into a civil conversation. How do we do this? Change the narrative. Understand that when you allow these uncivil thoughts to enter your mind, you have everything to lose. Your mind controls your very existence, so if you fill it with negativity what will you have? A negative life. Remember you don't lose anything by being positive. Many of us think negatively to protect ourselves from the pain of rejection. Instead of fearing this, accept that it is a possibility, but it only means that you are a step closer to your goals. All the rejection is you clearing your pathway to your yes.


What can you do today to encourage civil self-talk in your everyday life?


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